


Before Assisting Others

by Chameleon (ponchard)



Series: Good Old-Fashioned Passive Aggressive Discussion [1]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: (about this specific thing), Bickering Married Couple, Disguised As Yelling, Drums, Episode: The Day of the Doctor, Episode: s04e17-e18 The End of Time, Episode: s09e11 Heaven Sent, Episode: s09e12 Hell Bent, Episode: s10e05 Oxygen, Episode: s11e07 Kerblam!, Episode: s12e01-02 Spyfall, Flirting, Friends and Enemies and Lovers, GALLIFREY IS THE PROBLEM, Gallifrey, Gallifrey Falls No More, One Shot, Other, Post-Episode: s12e01-02 Spyfall, Short One Shot, THE MASTER IS RIGHT, Tension in general, Texting, The Tale of the Scorpion and the Frog, Time War (Doctor Who), Unresolved Sexual Tension, and the Doctor is too gentle, aside from being genderfluid, but apart, so much of it revolves around their alienation from home, so the revolution never happens, someone please hug these sad alien kids, the Master is too radical, the least straight relationship in space and time, their dynamic is so relentlessly queer-coded that it hurts, together they have everything they need to fix it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-11
Updated: 2020-01-11
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:00:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22215199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ponchard/pseuds/Chameleon
Summary: The Master gets service, and immediately starts a virtual slapfight with the Doctor.They’re both bitter about recent events, so it’s about as catty as you’d expect.I’ve been dying for more texting fics. This one’s a short post-Spyfall conversation.
Relationships: The Doctor/The Master (Doctor Who), Thirteenth Doctor/The Master (Dhawan)
Series: Good Old-Fashioned Passive Aggressive Discussion [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1603681
Comments: 18
Kudos: 145





	Before Assisting Others

one of my sources mentioned something about gallifrey  
that’s your home planet right?  
is everything ok???

**shove it**

touchy, doctor  
feeling homesick?

**you know that’s not it**

what, you gonna lecture me about aLl tHe cHiLdReN?

**you’ve brought them up...**

nice try  
your humans haven’t caught on to your games, have they?

**oh that is RICH  
whatever quarrel you have with the high council  
this timeless child  
it can’t involve *everyone*!**

mi6 can neither confirm nor deny  
come on  
drop the hero act  
we both know you’re fishing for clues

**what if I ignore your little homework assignment  
got any plans for that? **

that would require you to learn some restraint, love

although  
this regeneration has gotten better at the old avoid and repress, hasn’t it  
nice happy blank slate so the “fam” won’t get uncomfortable

**how’d you even get out?**

speaking of avoidance

**fine. I’ll leave you to your plotting then**

leaving! now there’s something you’re good at!

**helps that I’ve got a tardis**

can’t stick around to fix anything properly  
gotta swoop in and save them all again

do you think people like rassilon ever say “no more”  
did you think they stopped at me  
wait, my mistake  
you KNOW they didn’t

**Author's Note:**

>  **Hot Take:** jamming the perception filter was problematic
> 
>  **Hotter Take:** I didn’t think the leopards would eat _my_ face
> 
>  **Hottest Take:** in-character, the Doctor doesn’t take the time to fully unpack systemic forces, since fixing them is incompatible with their planet-hopping voluntourism. As a longer term planner, the Master is, ironically, much more aware of these issues. In this essay I will-
> 
> -
> 
> **Thanks for reading! Appreciate any comments/kudos you can sling my way. <3**


End file.
